Joy during bad times

We are all entitled for joy, and in particular in bad times when we get so many reasons to feel down. I am writing this article to help others to experience more joy also in very bad times. I share this from my personal experience and add some tips that help me and hopefully may be useful to others.

I am writing these words in the middle of the 2020 Coronavirus epidemic.

These days I am basically without a job and any ability to find a new one (no one really recruits). The government just issued some kind of a quarantine to fight the Corona virus, so I am stuck in my apartment together with my two young daughters and my wife who must work from home. Thus many of the boring regular day-to-day home work fall on my shoulders. Basic tasks, like cleaning, washing, arranging the house, that we used to do twice a week, have to be done on a daily basis due to the quarantine. In addition, making two small kids busy inside an apartment for so many straight days is a big challenge. The police runs visits outside of our home to ensure all stay at home. My relief comes from the quiet hour when I go out to buy some groceries, and in the grocery store you can feel the smell of fear in the air, and see people treat each other as infected. Believe me, I can find so many reasons to be miserable.

In order to stay sane and keep my family together, I had to find some joy in all this mess. It’s a must to really keep the spirit up and with it I hope to handle this crisis better. It is a daily struggle and to be honest, it is not always successful. But, I still could found some joy in all this crazy times using some very simple things I try to do (some already shared previously in my articles).

Here are the best 3 tips I can give, they take minutes a day, so you just need to remember to do them:

1. Small talk as much as possible – talking with others in bad times makes us feel much better, in particular when we are facing a common issue (like the Coronavirus epidemic). Despite of having interesting discussions, it makes our mind wander to different places and we can get much better perspective on our personal situation. So speak as much as possible with others, try to do it with different people.
2. Last 30 seconds of the day – think of some great moments you had during the day. It can be very small like enjoying playing with your children or it can be a good meeting or a good surprise you had. You will see that there are many rays of light that you might have missed. Know them and appreciate them. Overlooking the good things in life is easy, there are always good stuff, we just need to recognize them before we lose them.
3. Take a conscious decision about what you like in your life – Identify if you are happy or not always comes after a loss, which is too late. The way to recognize what makes you joy before losing it (and I am not talking about your favorite football team) is a conscious decision of what make you joy and what you love. It may be called mindfulness or being “present”, but I see it as just taking careful decision of what you like most. Don’t worry this decision can and will change, life always confronts such decisions. All I am saying is that happiness comes when you feel satisfied and fulfilled, but many don’t know if they are. So, think and take the best decision that will be on your mind always. It will help you get more joyful moments and reduce the risk of bad behavior towards the ones you love.

There is a long term benefit for this exercise. The ones who find their personal way to joy (in particular in bad times) will surely posses a vital tool for after the storm calms down. WE desperately need joy anytime. There is no single formula for experiencing more joy in our life, and it is very personal, but the common thing for all joyful people is being aware of their joy and recognize constantly joyful moments – make sense?

All the best, stay safe and healthy,

Ori F.